Sermon By Brother Harry Hardwick 

Friends, we learned again last month what we’ve been taught the last 40 years – Alabama is way ahead of the times. While the rest of the country (save Freehold) remains mired in all this liberal nonsense about democracy, freedom and equality, Alabama has long recognized what heathens will soon learn when an angry Jesus returns to draw a blood bath of holy terror for those who emphasized the carefree smile of individual liberty over the brass knuckles of religious control – the only law that matters is God’s law. (That is, those erstwhile immutable moral imperatives of the Lord that Jesus or that Paul fellow didn't tell us to go ahead and ignore.) And the only “god” who will count when Jesus unleashes the wrath of Revelation on all nonbelievers is God, the Father, the one who historically, when angry, killed sinners faster and with more relish than even a Texas governor. The One who has promised to inflict on non-Christians in the afterlife an eternity of horror so gruesome it will make Stephen King’s novels look like Martha Stewart Living. And believe you me, He’ll be starting with the federal judges of the 11th Circuit Court of Appeals.

Alabama Supreme Court Chief Justice Roy Moore is the only True Christian since Fred Phelps willing to make his dedication to Old Testament condemnation the focal point of the effort to eliminate his own political obscurity. Reverend Phelps was an unknown Kansas preacher of a congregation smaller than a Deep South Dixie Chicks fan club before he began appealing to our natural hatred of homos by taunting mourners at funerals of gay bashing victims that their deceased loved ones are burning in Hell. Today, he is the subject of national news broadcasts and editorials (though unfortunately still maintains a congregation that can easily fit inside a Waffle House). Judge Moore was an unknown local judge in Gadsden before placing a poster of the Ten Commandments on his courthouse wall. After ensuring daily that the media was aware of his décor, Judge Moore was catapulted to fame and overwhelmingly elected Alabama’s highest jurist. Not satisfied with the emphasis he had already given the Old Testament (or with his still limited political stature), Judge Moore selflessly thrust the Lord (and himself) into the limelight by sculpting our Judeo-Christian commandments into a granite monument so large it makes Vatican icons look like Barbie furniture. And under the cover of night, without letting any of the other judges know, he snuck it smack center into the rotunda of the court building where no one could avoid seeing it and being exposed to God’s true law.

Judge Moore’s Biblical dedication didn’t stop there. Taking a page from Reverend Phelps’ manual, in a case in which Alabama’s highest court unanimously denied custody of three children to their lesbian mother, Judge Moore wrote that homos are evil deviants the government should execute, just as the Old Testament commands:

“The State carries the power of the sword, that is, the power to prohibit conduct with physical penalties, such as confinement and even execution. It must use that power to prevent the subversion of children toward this lifestyle, to not encourage a criminal lifestyle.”

Alabamians cheered this return to fire and brimstone rhetoric while the rest of the depraved country scorned. Unfortunately, the heathens would have their revenge. A federal judge ordered Judge Moore to remove his granite creation, citing that nebulous thing called the “First Amendment” in preference over the Book of Exodus, concluding the Vegas-rivaling sculpture infringed on the separation of church and state. The 11th Circuit affirmed the judge’s ruling and the sodomy-loving U.S. Supreme Court refused to consider the matter. Judge Moore defied the courts, though, and the modern day ark of the covenant had to be forcibly removed. But not before scores of True Christians joined Judge Moore in loving most of the Ten Commandments so much, they found it in their righteous hearts to overlook the commandment against making a fuss over idolatry, to fall prostrate before a heavy chunk of granite in the lobby of the Alabama Supreme Court, claiming that they would not allow their God to be removed from a public building.

This isn’t the first time a great Alabama leader has defied the federal courts when they attempted to thwart God’s ancient laws in favor of the still untested Satanic “Constitution.” Back in 1963, True Christian, Governor George Wallace, stood in front of the University of Alabama with a shotgun to prevent the mixing of races in honor of the segregation that started with the Tower of Babel and finds support throughout the Good Book. It took the National Guard to get those colored kids safely into the school while the Lord held His nose. And we all know what havoc that has caused. How much safer, cleaner and less odorous would our schools be had Governor Wallace prevailed? While he failed that day, Governor Wallace’s defiance was prophetic and served as the catalyst for Judge Moore’s rebellion.

The federal courts’ action deprives True Christians of their God-given right to impose our correct religion on others. Judge Moore courageously refused to remain religiously neutral. When asked by Muslims if they could put the tenets of their faith in the rotunda, Judge Moore replied that only the real God’s words should appear there. Granted, removal of the monument doesn’t prevent any of us from worshiping God, but it does help to give folks with other beliefs the impression that they are entitled to as much respect as us. More importantly, not using all taxpayers' pocketbooks to promote Bible-believing, full-submersion Baptistism Christianity prevents us from forcing our religion on those of other faiths, which we all know is their only hope for salvation.

Alabama is now and has always been the lone Mecca for Christians – and a testament to all of the righteousness of theocracy. Rest assured, were it not so far away, this church would petition Freehold to secede from Iowa and join our Constitution-rebuking brothers and sisters to the South. Throughout history, other Americans have defied our right to force-feed Christian principles on those of false religions. The Pilgrims came to this country to escape the religious control of the Christian government of England. The Founding Fathers had little respect for state-sponsored religious indoctrination. President John Adams (Dead And Gone To Hell) signed the Treaty of Tripoli, stating that “The government of the United States is not in any sense founded on the Christian religion.” In a 1756 letter, he wrote: “This would be the best of all possible worlds, if there were no religion in it.” Thomas Jefferson (DAGTH) said, “Our civil rights have no dependence on religious opinions, any more than our opinion in physics and geometry.” James Madison (DAGTH) claimed: “Religious bondage shackles and debilitates the mind and unfits it for every noble enterprise…the legal establishment of Christianity [results in] superstition, bigotry, and persecution.” Thomas Paine (DAGTH) rejected all denominations of Judeo-Christian faith, saying, “I disbelieve them all.” Ben Franklin (DAGTH) and Ethan Allen (DAGTH) were deists, believing the universe functions independently of any god, with Allen writing: “I am not Christian.”

As a result, the Founding Fathers insisted on separation of church and state in that annoying First Amendment. And the federal courts, tools of Satan if there ever were ones, have agreed with them ever since, holding that government should not be seen as endorsing any particular religion or even religion in general. Religion, they outrageously claim, should remain a so-called private matter between private citizens. Now, I ask you, without the coercive powers of the state, how are we ever going to get all the heathen Muslims, Scientologists, Mormons, Episcopalians and Catholics into Baptist pews to tithe so that glorious new steeples and parking decks can be built to His glory?

In the end, come Judgment Day, Jesus will land first in Alabama, probably right next to the statute of Jefferson Davis in front of the Montgomery capital building. That great state’s citizens will probably be among the few to join the congregation of Landover in God’s glory. I suggest every one of you listening to this sermon starts tomorrow morning developing a taste for grits, hominy and humidity, before it’s too late.

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