Statement by Pastor Deacon Fred of Landover Baptist Church, "Where the Worthwhile Worship:"

"We applaud the Pastor Jerry Vine, former President of the Southern Baptist Convention, for reminding folks that that Mohammad fellow was a 'demon-possessed pedophile,' but think that, as usual, the Southern Baptist Convention was too complimentary. This pansy-like politeness and timidity, no doubt, springs from the SBC's well-known desire never to hurt the feelings of people when they tell them that they are going straight to Hell. Nevertheless, as True Christians®, we at Landover Baptist wish to remind all those ignorant towel-heads that Mohammad was also a shoplifter, a cross-dresser and a very bad tipper."

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