Landover Baptist | Where the Worthwhile Worship. Unsaved Unwelcome.

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George W. Bush - Official 2004 Campaign Site

Sister Betty Bowers on Anna Nicole Smith
Is rehab replacing Jesus as America's favorite vehicle for instantaneous forgiveness? More>

Brother Harry Interviewed by Famous Negro Atheist! Listen to our own Pastor Harry Hardwick's sharp tongue thwart persecution from a man of color! More>

VALENTINE'S DAY
Get a Heart On For Jesus Campaign!
We're sweeping the nation and cleaning up the subtle focus that Valentine's Day places on sex. Full Story>

VALENTINE'S DAY
Bible Sex Quiz See how Larry Flynt's magazines don't hold a candle to the Lord's original work! Take the Quiz!>

Dating Tips for Christian Men Growing up in a Christian home, you've been limited to chaperoned dating until the age of 21. From the Archives>

Baptist Sexuality
Satan is making your soft, inviting body HIS business! Stop his wandering red claws from tickling your True Christian™ fancy! More!>

Reader Mail!
100% Genuine E-mails sent directly to Landover Baptist from millions of concerned citizens. Read!>

Thousands of incredible and 100% real gift ideas in the Landover Baptist Store!

Christian Gamers are Leading Gnomes and Elves to Jesus!
With Millions of online gamers, the virtual world is ripe for evangelism! Christian Video Gaming News!>

A Map of Our Godly Church Campus!
Visit the sacred grounds of the most Godly Church in America! Look!>

FOR KIDS ONLY!
Accept Jesus Christ as Savior and Get a Free Playstation 3!
Limited time offer! Go!>

The War on Terror God's 10 secrets for waging a perfect war, how to spot a terrorist, and much more Go!>

Landover Baptist's Guide to Catholics Everything you need know about those hell-bound, ring-kissing, candle-lighting, Mary worshipping, skirt-wearing Catholics!
Get Informed!>

We have a permanent injunction against all unsaved persons. If you are unsaved, you are not allowed within a 10-mile radius of our church, nor are you allowed on this website. Kindly leave, and be about the Devil's business, for you are not welcome here. Glory!

If you are interested in getting saved, and you are not joking around about it just to upset us, we ask you kindly to click on this link and we'll help you get started on processing your eternal security certification right away!

MAY GOD DAMN YOU TO HELL!
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